A Second Stab

Today I decided to give my ex girlfriend a call. You could say this is cheating but I haven’t spoken to her in  3 years and I don’t know about you but I find talking over a cell phone way more pressurizing than in person cause in person there will be moments of silence that are natural. On the phone there’s no room for silent moments, you got to be on the ball constantly.

Anyway this convo went a lot smoother than yesterday. We spoke about our lives and what has changed since our last encounter, which was very interesting. She is a very talkative person so I didn’t really feel the pressure of keeping a flow, she made it very comfortable. The best part was that she is single haha. Not that I have been missing her and want her back, just the fact that there’s not some dick in her life with some kind of dick head pet name for her.

I get by with a little help from my friends said Joe Cocker

I asked a few mates for some advice and put them in my own words:

1.     Start the conversation immediately – Don’t drag things on. A missed chance offers much regret.

2.     Avoid cheesy pick up lines – Like “Hey baby are those space pants? Cause that ass is out of this world.” About 4 of 250 girls would be interested. Rather use immediate environment.

3.     Flirt with her from the get go – Don’t risk being put into the friend zone, you have enough friends.

4.     Be Real! Give your opinion even if it differs from hers – Women like men with a backbone.

5.     Give compliments sparingly – Be mysterious and don’t put yourself in her pocket.

Everything Happens For a Reason

Ok I took a lot out of the previous encounter. I cant say too much good was absorbed but not to worry, I am a strong believer that everything happens for a reason, even if you see no good within it, you or someone around you will learn from it.

My first attempt

Alrighty then…(Jim Carrey voice). Today I started my first conversation with a random. I must admit she wasn’t a complete random, she goes to university with me and we have only ever said Hi and Bye to one another. She was sitting alone having a cigarette in the quad. What a juicy target she provided. When I say “juicy” I stand far off any sexual insinuation. Her apparent allure on me was based on the facts that it wasn’t a complete stranger, she was alone & had just started her cigarette and there wasn’t many people around. Anyway the conversation began with me asking how her current assignment was treating her, which I felt was appropriate. Then after telling her about my assignment, I literally felt my brain empty out any English words I had learnt over the last 22.45 years. There was an all too familiar awkward silence, but thanx to the power of Marlboro, the smoke from her cancer stick terminated, along with her presence. I said goodbye and so did she, ending with “I’ll catch you later.” I smiled knowing that neither of us wished for such.

First things First

Before I go and put myself out there, I do believe I should familiarise myself with some useful tips from the interweb. So this is what I found useful.

5 Do’s of Conversation

o   Listen more than you talk.

o   Come to an occasion armed with topics at the ready.

o   Tailor the conversation to the listener.

o   Take your turn.

o   Think before you speak.

5 Don’ts of Conversation

Æ    Don’t interrupt.

Æ    Don’t talk to only one person when conversing in a group.

Æ    Don’t engage in “one-upping.”

Æ    Don’t overshare.

Æ    Don’t say:

-       “Am I boring you?”

-       “Huh?” “What?” “Say What?” “Eh?” (the latter is okay if you use an ear-horn).

-       “Actually, you should say ‘between you and me,” not ‘between you and I.’”

-       “Stop me if I’ve told you this story before…”